This is normally the part where MN Wildcat writes something cool and kinda witty. He’s not available this week, but that’s ok. This article is friggin’ long enough.
This article was always tough to do (and probably tougher to read) during the non-con. But with an 18-team league it’s just f-ing insane. To slightly reduce the insanity, we aren’t picking games against non-FBS opponents. There are still 15 games here to pick and comment on.
Oh yeah, and if it wasn’t already clear, we have a new platform for creating these articles. It sucks. It doesn’t even have polls. I’m 10 hours into this Goddamn thing right now and it’s not like it’s a real column with real writing.
Anyway, while sbnation-flavored wordpress sucks out loud, at least we have football back. Rejoice, OTE!!
About Last Year
We picked the title game. This graphic doesn’t include that result because my overtime pay rate just isn’t high enough. It was only one game, so this is just gonna have to be close enough.
Congrats to our fearless editor on his championship! And he didn’t even lose to his rival as a 20pt favorite!
Don’t @ me. MNW and AlmaOtter both picked Penn State to cover in the title game, so MNW is the winner.
The Picks
All times CDT, because reasons.
Thursday, August 28
Ohio Bobcats @ Rutgers Scarlet Knights
5PM | BTN | Rutgers -15.5 | O/U 49.5
Straight Up: Rutgers 9-0
Against the Spread: Rutgers 6-3
MNW: Ohio has a defense. I think that’s enough to help this hit the under, but Athan and the Knights’ ground game should be able to ease them through a MAC contender. Rutgers, 27-10.
RUR4: Everyone on the podcasts for both teams is hammering the over. Rutgers gave up a ton of big plays last year and Ohio is a good offense with a competent QB. That said, the Cats have only one returning OL or DL starter so even a lower tier Big Ten team in the trenches should control both sides. Rutgers 31, Ohio 20.
Buffkomodo: What I believe more than Rutgers being good is that Ohio is bad. ‘Gers with the home cover.
BoilerUp89: Ohio lost their coach and I don’t think the magic is still there. I hope it is – because my sister has season tickets to Ohio (primarily for their home game versus West Virginia) so I’ll likely be headed to Athens for a midweek game or two in November.
misdreavus79: There are 18 of these. Rutgers 20, Ohio 10
RockyMtnBlue: Actually, in this article there are only 15 of these, but misdreavus’s point stands. Rutgers 34-14
Buffalo Bulls @ Minnesota Golden Gophers
7PM | FS1 | Minnesota -17.5 | O/U 44.5
Straight Up: Minnesota 9-0
Against the Spread: Minnesota 8-1
MNW: If Darius Taylor and the Gophers can’t run over the Bulls, I think there are bigger problems than “Can Drake Lindsay hack it?” Gophers, 28-10.
RUR4: Can Drake Lindsay hack it? The Bulls have nine starters back on defense. I’m tempted to pick the underdogs outright by Darius Taylor should be healthy enough to will them to victory against a team that might struggle if forced to drop back and pass. Gophers 21-17.
BoilerUp89: Flips coin.
Buffkomodo: *shrugs*
misdreavus79: Holy jesus, 18! Minnesota 27, Buffalo 7
RockyMtnBlue: Nope. Still only 15. Minnesota 35-13
Nebraska Cornhuskers @ Cincinnati Bearcats
8PM | ESPN | Nebraska -6.5 | O/U 53.5
Straight Up: Nebraska 9-0
Against the Spread: Nebraska 8-1
MNW: Is Cincinnati good? A glorified home game for the ‘Skers and, dare I say it, a little continuity on the Nebraska offense?, should be enough. Huskers, 31-21.
RUR4: Sorsby at QB? How many points could they possibly score? Huskers 24-16.
Buffkomodo: No MNW, Cincinnati is not good and Nebraska will be okay to pretty good. Huskers with the solid road cover
BoilerUp89: Cincinnati is going to fire their coach later this year. Even if you don’t believe in year 3 Rhule, Nebraska should win this one pretty handily. Can we also talk about how Cincinnati is having a “home” game in Kansas City against Nebraska?
misdreavus79: I’m never getting through all of these. Nebraska 28, Cincinnati 21
RockyMtnBlue: As it happens, BU89, I do believe in year 3 Rhule. Nebby’s defense takes a step back this year, but the offense takes a much larger step forward. Nebraska 35-21
Miami (OH) RedHawks @ Wisconsin Badgers
8PM | BTN | Wisconsin -17.5 | O/U 39.5
Straight Up: Wisconsin 8-1
Against the Spread: Miami (OH) 6-3
MNW: O/U 39.5 Are the oddsmakers suggesting Billy Edwards might not be the answer in Madison? badgers, 21-7.
RUR4: Huge game as the Red Hawks prepare for the Knights in Week 2, which makes it a trap game for the defending MAC regular season champs. Miami will make a few big plays on offense, but can they get those to the endzone? Badgers 31-20.
Buffkomodo: uhhhh, Wisconsin? Is Miami that bad? I guess Wisconsin?
BoilerUp89: Miami is one of the better MAC teams – low bar, but whatever – and wisconsin is my pick to finish last in the B1G. Hooray! Gotta pick some upsets.
misdreavus79: I may have erred in betting on this game. Wisconsin 33, Miami Ohio 10
RockyMtnBlue: I think Buff’s detailed analysis on this game is spot on. Wiscy 28-10
Friday, August 29
Western Michigan Broncos @ Michigan State Spartans
6PM | FS1 | Michigan State -20.5 | O/U 49.5
Straight Up: Sparty 9-0
Against the Spread: Sparty 5-4
MNW: Chiles does Chiles things. Broncos get a pick six, still don’t cover. Sparty, 31-10.
RUR4: Middle of the pack MAC team … I like the MSU staff who probably showed the Rutgers film on repeat every day since this team last played an official game and didn’t look like they wanted to be there. Spartans 35-17.
Buffkomodo: I believe in what’s his face’s ability to win games he should win convincingly even though I shouldn’t and don’t know his name.
BoilerUp89: Western Michigan is bad. Not Ball State bad – more on that later – but still not good. MSU doesn’t have to be good to cover this one.
Buffkomodo: Jonathan Smith? Is that msu’s coach, right?
BoilerUp89: Ask me the head coach of Drake basketball and I know it. B1G football? Not happening.
Buffkomodo: I mean we’re an interim removed from Tucker. 3 kids and a magical season and an iubb coaching search. I’ll excuse myself.
Oh, it’s Ben McCollum BU!
BU89: Nah, Eric Henderson from South Dakota State. McCollum is the best former Drake coach in the B1G this year.
Buffkomodo: Eric Henderson? Wasn’t he a guard with the Knicks?
Nope. That’s Alan Houston. Whoopsie.
misdreavus79: At least in conference play we’ll only have nine of these. Michigan State 28, Western Michigan 20
RockyMtnBlue: Freshmen quarterbacks suck. Freshmen wide receivers suck. Aiden Chiles and Nick Marsh are no longer freshmen. Michigan State 38-14
Saturday, August 30
(1) Texas Longhorns @ (3) Ohio State Buckeyes
11AM | FOX | Ohio State -2.5 | O/U 47.5
Straight Up: OSU 6-3
Against the Spread: OSU 6-3
MNW: Don’t know, and anyone who tells you they do is a supremely confident liar. OSU, 28-24.
RUR4: Two teams I never trust in Week 1, hmmm, I’ll take the overconfident OSU hangover game in the shoe, Texas 31-28.
Buffkomodo: The ONLY thing that would make me happier than a meteor hitting in Tuscaloosa, Gainesville, and Knoxville at the same time would be Indiana slogging Alabama. Failing that, I’ll take a B1G power to crush an SEC power. Give me OSU. Don’t break my heart Buckeyes.
BoilerUp89: Tejas 44 – OSU 24.
misdreavus79: Stupid google won’t let me use my own keyboard shortcuts because of course they fucking took over the keyboard shortcuts. Ohio State 17, Texas 14
RockyMtnBlue: Last year, Texas visited Ann Arbor and smoked a top-10 ranked Big10 team on their own field, so now they think it’s easy. Turns out that Michigan squad kinda sucked. Ohio State sadly doesn’t suck. Texas gets an attitude adjustment. I blame the Republicans. Ohio State 31-14
Florida Atlantic Owls @ Maryland Terrapins
11AM | BTN | Maryland -14.5 | O/U 60.5
Straight Up: Maryland 9-0
Against the Spread: Maryland 6-3
MNW: FAU is baaaaaaad. Bad bad bad bad baaaaaad. If September-ish Maryland can’t take care of this, it ain’t good. Terps, 38-17.
RUR4: FAU picked up the Lumen twins, Tyclean and Tycoolhill from Rutgers. They are third string … so maybe the Owls are better than we think? September Maryland should go nuts, Maryland 48-10.
Buffkomodo: Larry and BU89 are the only two who will care about this game, ironically for similar reasons (hot seats)
BoilerUp89: I do not care about this game. Winning it does nothing to save Maryland coaching jobs.
misdreavus79: Halfway there! Maryland 35, Florida Atlantic 7
RockyMtnBlue: I couldn’t possibly. Maryland 28-14
Ball State Cardinals @ Purdue Boilermakers
11AM | BTN | Purdue -18.5 | O/U 50.5
Straight Up: Purdue 9-0
Against the Spread: Balls Tate 6-3
MNW: This is your chance, Purdue. And the chance to do it against a Boiler alumnus, as we’ll hear approximately 20 times during the broadcast.
Just kidding, no one’s watching this shit. Boilers, 27-23.
RUR4: Zero prep for this prediction … so … Purdue 30-14.
Buffkomodo: I’ll have you know Kevin Wilson lost his first game at Indiana to Ball State…
BoilerUp89: Last year’s Purdue team loses this game 13-37. I don’t think the roster is particularly talented, but the coaching will at least be competent and should have the team in a position to beat Ball State. If they don’t, the train comes off the rails early and I start talking about basketball before Labor Day.
Good moment of the week: you guys remember Tyler Trent? From the Tyler Trent game against OSU in 2018? His younger brother and former Purdue walk-on Ethan Trent might start against Ball State this Saturday.
One other interesting note because I don’t really want to talk about Purdue football. Ball State’s head coach Mike Uremovich is a Purdue alumni and was already at Purdue’s campus a few weeks ago. He was dropping off his son – a freshman in the Purdue engineering program. No word on who his son will be rooting for.
misdreavus79: I can’t be as bad as last year, right? Purdue 28, Ball State 3
RockyMtnBlue: Speak for yourself, MNW. This is exactly the kind of trash tornado shit show football (AKA Big10 West football) that keeps me going in these trying times. Purdue 27-10
Northwestern Wildcats @ Tulane Green Wave
11AM | ESPN-U | Tulane -5.5 | O/U 46.5
Straight Up: Tulane 6-3
Against the Spread: Tulane 5-4
MNW: Retzlaff? MORE LIKE RUST-LAUGH.
Come back to me later, I’ll do better.
This is all based on the hope—not knowledge, not firm belief, not anything more than hope—that the combination of Preston Stone and a veteran RB in Cam Porter can will the Northwestern offense to victory. Every other year, a good transfer quarterback. I don’t make them, these are just the rules. ‘Cats, 21-18.
RUR4: I got the Green Wave in this one, is it even jNW that is good or odd jNW that is? Regardless, they will be better later in the year. Tulane 27-21.
Buffkomodo: Tulane because Northwestern is in TROUBLE already.
BoilerUp89: Tulane by 2 on a last second field goal
misdreavus79: Ok second wind. Northwestern 10, Tulane 7
RockyMtnBlue: Seriously? A road game at Tulane? In early September? Y’all know that school is in New Orleans, right? I’d have expected better strategy from the nerd school. Still, Northwestern’s defense is probably not terrible. Ima regret this. Northwestern 21-20
Old Dominion Monarchs @ (20) Indiana Hoosiers
1:30PM | FS1 | Indiana -23.5 | O/U 54.5
Straight Up: Indiana 9-0
Against the Spread: Indiana 9-0
MNW: Ew. No thanks. Hoosiers, 31-6.
RUR4: ODU can fight, but Indiana will hit the gas. Hoosiers 38-10.
Buffkomodo: I can see a 14 point halftime lead changing to a 28 point win. Hoosiers baby.
BoilerUp89: All IU’s football coach does is run up the score on bad teams. Google him. Hoosiers by 48.
misdreavus79: Ok but the SEC went to nine games so does that mean Indiana has to play teams with a pulse OOC? Indiana 66, Old Dominion 3
RockyMtnBlue: Am I missing something? How the hell is this line only 23.5? Indiana 45-10
Nevada Wolf Pack @ (2) Penn State Nittany Lions
5PM | BTN | Rutgers -15.5 | O/U 49.5
Straight Up: Penn State 9-0
Against the Spread: Nevada 5-4
MNW: Ewwwwwww. No thanks. Penn State, 49-7.
RUR4: Franklin will try to ice the kicker and fail as time expires, Penn State 45-3.
Buffkomodo: That’s a lot of points for a team that doesn’t score that many point in general.
BoilerUp89: Big spread but PSU plays for style points and goes for the jugular.
misdreavus79: Penn State was supposed to play Virginia Tech in 2025, but covid canceled the Blacksburg trip. Instead of rescheduling, they chose to cancel the series. So we get this. Penn State 59, Nevada 10
RockyMtnBlue: This is going to be an ugly ugly football game. Not in a fun, B10 West kinda way. More like a lion gutting a squirrel kinda way. Penn State 56-7
New Mexico Lobos @ (14) Michigan Wolverines
6:30PM | NBC/Peacock | Michigan -34.5 | O/U 49.5
Straight Up: Michigan 9-0
Against the Spread: New Mexico 6-3
MNW: Color me actually curious to see how New Mexico looks under Jason Eck. It won’t be right away, and it certainly won’t be against Michigan—but I like college football just a little more when the Lobos are fun. Wolverines, 38-10.
RUR4: Michigan might not cover, but the Lobos should throw some wrinkles early, Michigan 31-12.
Buffkomodo: See previous statement, but this line is 35 points.
BoilerUp89: I don’t trust a freshman QB to cover this big of a spread. Michigan wins by three scores but the freshman makes some mistakes.
misdreavus79: Almost there… Michigan 29, New Mexico 13
RockyMtnBlue: I see Michigan is ranked again. Idiot voters. Do they never learn?
Bryce Underwood is really really talented. He’s also a true freshman quarterback who will have ZERO pass protection. Oh yeah, and he turned 18 nine fucking days ago. Sorry Waw, but in all likelihood RNGesus will be wearing a winged helmet this year.
New Mexico to cover is free money. The under is really free money. Michigan 19-3.
Missouri State Bears @ Southern Cal Trojans
6:30PM | BTN | USC -35 | O/U 59.5
Straight Up: USC 9-0
Against the Spread: USC 9-0
MNW: Genuinely no idea. Maybe Missouri State scores first just for some brief hilarity. USC, 48-7.
RUR4: USC’s defense gave up some yards and points last year but should score plenty for the cushion, USC 50-16.
Buffkomodo: Invert the logic from the previous 2 statements.
BoilerUp89: Missouri State is new to FBS and gets to travel to USC. Should have stayed in the MVC guys. You gave up Arch Madness for this?
misdreavus79: I guess technically not FCS is the best kind of not FCS? USC 44, Missouri State 7
RockyMtnBlue: No. No I will not. USC 42-0
Utah Utes @ UCLA Bruins
10PM | FOX | Utah -6.5 | O/U 52
Straight Up: Utah 7-2
Against the Spread: Utah 8-1
MNW: Will Utah give Devon Dampier the space and freedom he needs to win games?
Hell, this pick could just be a statement of “I don’t think UCLA can beat the Utah defense.” Utes, 22-14.
RUR4: Utah will win if they can find where UCLA is located. Could be a dogfight. Utah 20-13.
Buffkomodo: Who cares
BoilerUp89: I agree with Buff. Why are we picking Pac 12 games?
misdreavus79: Nico ain’t going to make UCLA into that much of a contender right off the bat. Utah 20, UCLA 10.
RockyMtnBlue: Once again, Buff’s analysis is penetratingly accurate. But I need to pick an upset somewhere, so what the hell? UCLA 24-21
Colorado State Rams @ Washington Huskies
10PM | BTN | Washington -21.5 | O/U 53
Straight Up: Washington 9-0
Against the Spread: Washington 5-4
MNW: I have kept Rams QB Brayden Fowler-Nicolosi on my fantasy roster for another year—along with Demond Williams—in the HOPE that this is the year they both explode for yards and points and all sorts of good shit. That would dictate something like a 49-48 shootout, which we would all love.
Instead, something dumb like Washington, 38-21 will occur.
RUR4: Just hit the over. So idk, Washington 38-34?
Buffkomodo: Who cares but it’s the Pacific Northwest.
BoilerUp89: I got a bunch of games right picking against the team that had Ryan Walters on their coaching staff last year. Going to continue to do so until it stops working. Colorado State keeps it close but UDub pulls off the win.
misdreavus79: WE DID IT! Washington 38, Colorado State 6
RockyMtnBlue: I’m not fully sold on Washington, but CSU is ungood. Washington 38-14
To Cowardly to Schedule an FBS Opponent
(12) Illinois (Western Illinois)
(7) Oregon (Montana State)
Iowa (UAlbany)
MNW: Maybe against lesser Big Ten teams, Montana State makes it exciting, but not against Oregon. I’m already tired of Iowa for the year.
RUR4: No comment.
Buffkomodo: Comment.
BoilerUp89: Nothing wrong with getting your only win of the season against a strong, tough FCS opponent? Right, guys?
misdreavus79: no
RockyMtnBlue: SHAME!
No polls, so y’all just gonna have to make your predictions in the comments.